Do you ever feel like you can't find your voice? Like the world just talks over you and around you and you just can't get anything worthy out. I've felt like that since we moved to Utah. I'm invisible here. I'm not thin, super pretty, blond, or have 5 kids and still look like a super model. I'm not sure I own ANYTHING designer. I don't drive a brand new fancy car of any sort. I don't even have a car. We have a Ford F-150.
I don't speak the language here. I am not even sure what a Ward is and couldn't tell you the difference between and Bishop and an Elder for a million dollars. And all this time I thought those things on every street corner were Churches. They are Meeting Houses or something.
But lately, since we've been given the hope of moving, since I've been pregnant, I've been finding my voice in the oddest places. At Outback, in Walmart, the Internet, talking to the neighbors. I'm tired of being invisible. I'm tired of being treated second class. I'm tired of people using the relative anonymity of the Internet to bully and belittle. I sick of Utahans.
This post has no point really. I'm nervous about today. Jamie is talking to one of the offices back East. I really need it to go well. And that is it. Blather about nothing really.
I really enjoyed your post. I am from Idaho, but we had this awful move to South Dakota to a no where town. I don't feel invisible because I became the your gonna notice me person, but the people here did make me feel like the Utah Moms are treating you. Did You know you can pick a Utah mom out in any other state now that you've lived there, lol. Sorry, that's kinda mean. Don't worry the buildings on every corner are churches, just the same exact church different building. I'm excited to possibly move back to Idaho, but nervous that I might not fit in with the Utah mom group too...Oh well...Hope you get some good news. :)
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